4-Step Process How to Fix a Failed Relationship
When there is a conflict in a relationship, the last thing that many of us want to do is to have to talk with the other party, if we feel they have wronged us.
However, if you want a resolution to the tension and pain that the conflict has caused, it is a good idea to talk to the other person. Many times, you can gain insight into why the conflict began and learn what steps are necessary to heal the relationship and yourself!
Try these methods to increase dialogue with others and strengthen your relationships:
1. Begin to reopen communication by listening. You can learn about the other person’s feelings and beliefs when you practice active listening. Many conflicts begin when one party wants to be heard, as we all do, but believes that no one is listening.
· Rather than thinking about whether you agree with what the speaker is saying, learn to focus on their words. Give the speaker verbal and visual cues that let them know that you hear what they’re saying.
2. Set some ground rules. Make it safe for the other party to open to you, and for you to share your perspective.
· Set a time limit for each person to speak, and the other person to listen. Usually 5 to 10 minutes is a good time frame.
· Then, the listener should summarize what they’ve heard, so the speaker knows they were listening and understood their meaning.
· Swap places and allow the other party to share their thoughts.
3. Emphasize the positive. Avoid placing blame and making demands.
· Let the other person know how their actions affect you without attacking them or making accusations.
· Explain what they can do to make it easier for you to communicate with them. Ask what you can do to enhance your communications.
· Avoid yelling matches. When we yell at one another, we are no longer listening, but trying to force our view on the other. If you feel frustrated and tempted to yell, take a time out and agree to discuss the situation again once you’ve regained control of your feelings.
· Rather than making demands or giving ultimatums, let your partner know how you feel and what you want by making a respectful request, with the full understanding they have the freedom to comply or deny the request.
· Take ownership for your part in misunderstandings. Determine how the choices you’ve made may have led up to the current conflict.
4. Learn to respond rather than react. Take the time to plan your response, rather than letting your emotions get away from you. Consider how your response will be received.
· If you have a hard time managing your anger or other emotions, relaxation techniques like taking a deep breath can help you lower your stress and deal better with them.
While most of us spend a good part of our day talking with others, true communication takes time and practice to master. These tips can help you to develop your dialogue skills and strengthen your relationships with others.We have more resources below on How to Fix a Failed Relationship
The best thing to hold onto in life is each other. Love relationships are one of the greatest sources of happiness and meaning for human beings, yet also the cause of lasting sadness and regret. Growing up, we learn much about fairytale weddings, but not a whole lot about what it really takes to keep love and caring alive for the long haul.
So, you’re sick of fighting all the time? Is it starting to feel like your relationship is on the rocks? You’re probably wondering how it got to this. Or worse, if all the problems that have now become the daily themes mean that the two of you simply aren’t meant to be together.
When your relationship is suffering, you have a choice; put it out of its’ misery or nurse it back to health. If the love that you share is worth saving, act quickly to reverse and repair the damage that’s already been done. Seek first to understand, then be understood.
Today we are talking about how to fix a broken relationship. I also shared with you a personal story about friendship.
1000 Questions for Couples
1000 Questions for Couples
Based on Dr. Arthur Aron’s research I have not only put together questions that will help couples FALL IN LOVE but have scientifically collected a total of 1,000 of the most important questions couples should ask each other.
These are questions that go beyond small talk and simply making conversation like you will find in most “questions” books. You will NOT find questions like “if you were a color, what color would you be” or “what is your favorite flavor of ice cream”.
One of the biggest reason marriages end in divorce is because couples fail to ask the big questions before they walk down the aisle.
If couples simply spent some time asking each other the questions that really matter, they’d greatly increase their chances of staying together.
The great thing about a “question book” is that it makes it easier to ask those difficult questions and encourages an environment to address them.
But is Michael Webb’s “1000 Questions For Couples” the right book for this?
In short, yes. Most question books ‘beat around the bush,’ never really providing the important questions, and others simply don’t have enough questions.
On the other hand, Webb has put together the most comprehensive collection of questions, covering every single topic you’d ever want to know about before tying the knot.
It includes tough subjects like money, child rearing, career, past and present relationships, religion, morals, convictions & beliefs, personality, and even sex.
But don’t get me wrong while there are many serious and tough topics to discuss, there are also many “lighter” yet just as important topics, including the car and driving, vacations, food and well being, pets, and your favorite things.
That’s one thing I really loved about this book. It covered every conceivable topic from the super serious to the light-hearted and fun, making it easy for couples to start with easy questions and build their way up to important ones.
Also, a great bonus is having the ability to deliver 3 – 5 of the questions to my email each day, making everything automatic. I just go about my day and get new questions to ask my loved one, without having to really think about it.
In all, there’s nothing really negative I can say about this book. It delivers exactly what it says and covers every question you would ever want to ask your loved one.
I highly recommend this book for everyone. NOT just couples who are thinking of getting married but also couples who just want to feel closer together, or people dating, who just want more things to talk about.
Read the questions that have made strangers fall in love and couples drawn closer together
Disclaimer: In the name of full transparency, please be aware that this blog post contains affiliate links and any purchases made through such links will result in a small commission for me (at no extra cost for you).